I had actually forgotten today was Halloween until I was driving through campus and an Oompa Loompa walked in front of my car. Now normally I don’t start hallucinating Oompa Loompas until well after noon, so that threw me. You would think I’d recall what day it is since I spent last night in possibly the lamest haunted house in the long, sad history of lame haunted houses. Fearplex. They called it Fearplex. Basically it consisted of me leading a congo line of my wife, my step-daughter, and several of her friends at shuffle speed through a maze of dark rooms where people would pop out and I’d advise them to try the redhead at the back of the line because my wife is probably the most nervous haunted house goer ever. She screamed in line when someone tried to give her a flyer. However, the planning of the house was so poor that we were continually getting lost and having to ask the ghouls for directions which ruins some of the atmosphere. I WILL EAT YOUR FACE AND FEED YOUR ENTRAILS TO MY….oh take the second left and loop around the headless babies….BABOONS OF DOOM!!!