In Theaters This Week (9/23/2016) – The Magnificent Seven, Storks, The Dressmaker

Kate Winslet, The Dressmaker

Each Thursday we look at what is going to be coming out in theaters this weekend, show you the trailers for the big releases, predict the box office winner and just generally give you enough of a carrot to pull you through the rest of the work week.  September 23rd gives us ANOTHER remake, an animated release, and a film where Kate Winslet makes dresses (called The Dressmaker…..s’how I knew).


This weekend’s challengers to Captain Sully’s throne are a Denzel Washington/Chris Pratt remake of the classic Western: The Magnificent Seven, an animated film about Storks (called helpfully….Storks), and did I mention there was a film in which Kate Winslet makes dresses called The Dressmaker or did I interrupt you from preordering your tickets?  Rotten Tomatoes has them all hovering around the magic 60% line of Fresh/Rotten, but only The Magnificent Seven is slightly above it at the time of writing.

The Dressmaker (Kate Winslet, Liam Hemsworth, R, 1hr 58min)

 The Magnificent Seven (D. Washington, Chris Pratt, R, 2hr 12m)

Storks (Andy Samberg, PG, 1hr 27min)


KT picked Sully to repeat.  I agonized over that call since I’m riding a winning streak going back to when you idiots made The Angry Birds Movie #1.  No, not bitter.  I thought Blair Witch might provide a challenge to The Miracle on the Hudson, but not only did Blair Witch only earn $9.6 million to Sully’s winning $21.7 million, Cinemascore polled people leaving the horror film and they gave it a D+ rating.  That may be the lowest audience feedback score I have ever seen.  Do you think people now realize after nearly 20 years that the whole Blair Witch thing sucked?  Well they can wrap themselves in Kate Winslet’s arms as she makes a dress for them.  I’m totally mocking this film straight-faced, by the way,  (Lifetime prediction record 26-3).
Sully, Aaron Eckhart, Tom Hanks


I think Sully will continue to perform strongly, but the star power of Pratt and Denzel will be enough to make The Magnificent Seven the new king of the box office….unless there is a huge subpopulation of dressmakers who I’ve just sent running to the movies.

Denzel Washington;Chris Pratt;Ethan Hawke;Byung-hun Lee;Vincent D Onofrio;Manuel Garcia-Rulfo;Martin Sensmeier
(l to r) Byung-hun Lee, Manuel Garcia-Rulfo, Ethan Hawke, Denzel Washington, Chris Pratt, Vincent D’Onofrio and Martin Sensmeier in Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures and Columbia Pictures’ THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN.


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