OK. Let’s get this out-of-the-way. The Lone Ranger is not the worst movie of 2013. It had the good fortune to occur in the same calendar year as You’re Next. Short of someone shooting a three-hour nature study of horse apples, You’re Next is secure in being the worst motion picture of 2013 (and quite possibly the decade). However, if you would like to see an iconic American hero dragged through a pile of horse apples (unfortunately not a metaphor), then Gore Verbinski has delivered the definitive version of The Lone Ranger. Continue reading Movie Review: The Lone Ranger (2013)
There was a featured article this week in Entertainment Weekly about Johnny Depp’s career descent into a sort of Disney quirky characters factory. The article wondered, given The Lone Ranger‘s dismal performance at the box office, if Depp would – for lack of a better way to put it – start trying again. The next day, Deadline broke that Depp had signed on to reprise The Mad Hatter in a sequel to Alice in Wonderland (tentatively titled Into the Looking Glass, after the second Alice book by Lewis Carroll). Tim Burton, who directed the first film, will not return; the film will be helmed by Muppets director, James Bobin. So, I suppose the answer to EW’s query would be….nope.
I honestly expected to hate Alice. I’ve tired of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp’s twin descent into career plagiarism, and I’m not sure why I even went to see it in the theater. Much to my surprise, I was really liking it. Wonderland is a canvas more open to interpretation than almost any in literature, and I was kind of seriously onboard with it. Then my review went from a 9 to a 6 in the last ten minutes of the movie. Futterwacken. I can’t even….the syllables are there in the word to make up my response to it. I don’t think a clearer example exists of someone not being able to say to a director or an actor….that’s freaking nuts, cut that. Steven Spielberg makes me feel the same way. He’s gone utterly gutless and can’t figure out how to cut a movie together to save his life, but no one can tell him otherwise. When people get to a point in their career or allow themselves to be surrounded by people who never tell them “No”, then you’re simply futterwacked.